You don't reach out to hurt former loved ones if you're trying to heal yourself, you reach out to hurt because the pain you're infecting gives you pleasure. "See I made it, you were wrong, I have talent, but I'm still fucked up and so are you." For twenty years, unable to move on, and the book is as far away from cathartic as you can get. Her ex husband has basically become the same thing, except it was forced on him, he's been mutated into a broken weapon of revenge. She's gross due to her own life choices, but doesn't see it and still living as if she's a successful person. The obese dancing woman in the first screen is what Amy Adams character has become spiritually. Like all things based on materialism, it eventually becomes gross and offensive. She has also emotionally and spiritually assassinated herself for a short term fix of materialism. That whole book was a weapon designed to get his ex-wife to share his fate of suicide. So why would they meet? Their love died but was kept alive briefly in Edward's book since Susan remembered she had a choice of a different life but never took that path. Their life paths diverted so long ago, they have nothing in common. On the other hand Edward never remarried but he stayed true to his work and became a published author. She has been living in a mansion for 20 years and needs a butler to open a package for her (the butler even reads Edward's letter out loud at the beginning of the movie). Even when Susan tried to make some amendments like being supportive of one employee at her art gallery instead of just firing her, it's too late for a more substantial change. I think the morale of the story is that revenge changes nothing. Susan felt unhappy in her first marriage because she couldn't afford a better lifestyle and now is trapped not only in a loveless marriage, she is trapped in a lifestyle that makes her feel empty and lonely. Edward was perceived as 'weak' and he regrets hiding in the bushes when he had the opportunity to save his wife and daughter or at least die trying to save them. The book is a metaphor of how their love died abruptly and the regrets for the choices they made in the past. I think Edward says in the movie that he writes 'to keep things alive.' Susan remembers her first marriage and how she genuinely loved Edward, even though she did some 'unforgivable things to him'. I don't think Susan's ex-husband committed suicide either.
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